Another vivid flashback I have was after I got home from the hospital. As you can imagine, I was exhausted and extremely sad that I couldn't stop crying. I finally laid down in bed and tried to close my eyes, but that's when I felt the overwhelming feeling of energy and I knew it was Elyce. In the past, I have only felt this feeling once before and it was shortly after my great aunt passed away. It's a feeling that is hard to explain, but I can describe it as the sensation you feel when someone walks in the house and you can feel them before you can see them. It's like that. When my great aunt passed away, I felt that same feeling and ignorantly thought she was going to show up in front of me. In Elyce's case, I felt as if she was actually laying on top of me. It was her...I knew it was her. We had such an amazing strong bond since she was born and I'm sure she wasn't ready to leave me as I wasn't ready for her to leave. Her soul was so powerful it scared me. I was afraid if I opened my eye, she would be standing in front of me. Strangely enough, when Rose (my ex-mother-in-law) passed away, I couldn’t feel her presence. Who knows....Rose was probably busy being with Elyce and It wouldn't surprise me if Elyce was able to feel her energy.
2 weeks following Elyce's death, I continued feeling Elyce's energy when I laid down to sleep and when I would awaken. It felt as if she was sitting on the edge of my bed watching over me. The first couple of nights, I turned my back to the window, because I had a chair next to my bed where I kept Elyce’s last clothes she wore. I literally would jump into bed, turn my back to the chair and close my eyes without opening them. As soon as I closed my eyes, I can feel her presence. Then I was able to feel the heaviness of her soul. Little by little I started opening my eyes and talking to her as if she was present. I would tell her that I wasn't scared and that I knew she was there to help me get through the first couple of months of this agonizing pain.
I remember when I first started meditating and how Elyce's energy wouldn’t allow me to settle into my meditation. At one of my meditation seminars, that was held at the Chopra Center, I met a monk that really spoke to me and asked him what I should do about Elycse's energy that was distracting me. He told me to just talk to her. He said, "Talk to her. She can hear you. Set up a pillow for her to sit and ask her to sit there and meditate with you. Tell her it's time to mediate and you will watch that she will settle down". So I did what I was told and purchased a pillow for her and told her it was time to meditate and she needs to settle in and meditate with me. I also told her that if she doesn't settle down, it would distract me. Sure enough, it worked.
Trust me when I say that I would have been the first one to judge this experience. In my analytical mind, things need to make sense and everything has a place and things fit in their place. Not in this case, right? But after going through this experience, I am now a BELIEVER. It took this horrifying event and pain to understand and accept that there is much more to this world as I know it. We all get signs, but we will never be able to see them if we aren't open to them. If we judge rather than accept there is "something" more; even if we can't pinpoint what that "something" is, then we won't be able to truly experience this wonderful gift we are all given.
Elyce's energy stayed with me for a bit over a year. I finally had to let her know that I would be ok and it was time for her to go on her way and continue her journey. It was difficult for me to do, but I didn't want to be the one keeping her from her other obligations. I do miss feeling her energy, but she hasn't stopped sending me signs. Those signs are always there and I thank you Elyce for all those messages. You send them when I most need them and for that I am very grateful!!
