Worst day of my life

It was Friday, July 20….woke up in the morning after sleeping a few hours in the hospital.  Shane had gone downstairs to check in on Elyce.  As usual, I asked him how she was doing, but this time he said she had a little issue last night.  Elyce's oxygen fell and they needed to bring her oxygen levels back up from 75 to 85.  I thought ok....just another bump on the road.

Coincidentally, there was another mother of a Down ’s Syndrome 18 year old that went into the hospital with sepsis and similar symptoms.  He had been there for 1 month and they finally removed the tracheal intubation and was on a oxygen mask.  On day 3, the doctor introduced her to me and she told me it would be a long bumpy road.  She advised me to try not to get on the rollercoaster ride.  She also said there will be less than baby steps in progress, but then there may be a big setback.  This was part of the process in getting Elyce back to good health.

Elyce was diagnosed with septic shock.  Her kidneys and lungs were failing, but they started the dialysis and she seemed to be responding well.  She was also intubated and they also had to paralyze her so she gives her body a rest and doesn't fight the intubation. 

So that Friday morning, I got dressed and went downstairs to talk to Elyce and play her favorite song, "U Smile".  Shortly thereafter, they lowered the oxygen to 80 and I thought to myself, she can hear me.  I told her to be strong so I can take her to Spain to see Alba.  I told her how I was so very proud of her and how much I loved her.

Shortly after, I went into work for a few hours then thought I would head home to pick up some clothes from home.  On my way home, Shane texted to tell me her eyes were not dilating and there can be 2 reasons for this.  1) medicines or 2) water in the brain that would require surgery.  Once I heard that, I went straight to the hospital, but not without talking to God again.  I told him that I know Elyce has always been heaven sent and if it's her time to go then take her, but don't make her suffer.  I begged him to keep her here, but I also knew that I would not want to see her suffer anymore.

As I arrived to the hospital, Elyce was having her 4 hour dialysis.  The plan was to finish that up, stabilize her and take her down for a CT scan of her brain.  Doctors came and told Shane the results were in.  Shane came to tell me and said, I don't think this is good news.  He asked me if I wanted to go talk to them and I said, no.  My aunt went with him and as I suspected, Shane came back in tears telling us that Elyce was already brained dead.  As we fell to the floor and wept, things needed to be decided.  As we have always said, we don't want her to suffer anymore and we knew that the only decision was to take her off life support.  We called my siblings and we decided to wait until her aunt Vicky and Mara arrived from Thousand Oaks to say our final goodbyes……..